Had my second interview on Thursday for a job in California! Really hoping I might get the third interview and see where it goes from there 🙂
Not leaving the house for nearly two weeks because you can’t get going and struggle to even get out of bed. And then finally, the light breaks through, and you get up, and you go out, and it feels like the fog has cleared. At least, for the time being.
“I guess I’ve still got some more healing to do.”
— The Darjeeling Limited (2007)
Happy New Year lovelies! I will be posting more this year than I have been, I look forward to sharing this journey with all of you xxxxx
Going to make 2017 the year of positivity and possibility. Going to work hard at this, I really am x
Applied for a few jobs the past couple days! Fingers crossed something works out! x
Let 2017 be the year of love. Let love finally reign supreme over all of us.
Tell the people you love, that you love them.
People love to pretend that everything will be ok, and will work out. But the ugly, ugly truth is we don’t know that that’s true. There’s no guarantee in life that everything will work out? Or that everything happens for a reason? Or that we’ll all end up happy? Or find love? It’s all a fairytale. And no one wants to admit that to themselves, or to others. But it’s true. I can’t pretend like things are ok or my life is going the way I want it to or that things will work out. Because none of that is true. Because I don’t know if they will. I have lived a very blessed life, and I am grateful for it. But I can’t pretend like certain things aren’t missing. Yes I have traveled and seen some of the most beautiful cities in the world, and for that I am eternally grateful, and truly, truly blessed, and thankful. But I’ve never felt love, true love, and that makes am very sad. I’ve never felt like anyone’s first choice. I’ve always felt like a burden. And that hurts. I feel very alone most of the time, and it’s very painful. Isolation and loneliness can kill you. But you have to try and keep fighting. And I am trying. I’m trying. Trying.
I wish all of you peace and hope as we navigate this time together as a nation, and a people.
Wrote a poem last night and came up with another new idea for a short story. Haven’t found many good jobs lately, but I remain hopeful that one day I’ll find the sun.