Thinking you’ve pulled yourself out it, but realizing you’ve relapsed and fallen back into the abyss of sadness. And choosing to try to pull yourself out of it tomorrow. Again.
Not leaving the house for nearly two weeks because you can’t get going and struggle to even get out of bed. And then finally, the light breaks through, and you get up, and you go out, and it feels like the fog has cleared. At least, for the time being.
Feeling tired and sad for literal days on end, almost a week actually, and being unable to leave the house, or even get out of bed half the time.
When you feel like you’re on the verge of a breakdown and you’re not sure what you can even do to stop it anymore. Every day feels like Groundhog’s Day.
Watch college football all day, even though you don’t really care and your alma mater sucks this year. Wish you were still in London. Wrap yourself in a blanket because it’s already cold, and it’s only October. Start to feel like you’re going to fall asleep at 4:24 pm.
Sad, sad, sad. I really hope I can find a good job with good health care and benefits, so I can hopefully get my mental health sorted. I’ve been pretty sure I have depression for years (and it runs in my family, it’s genetic), but I’ve never had health care to cover that kind of thing, so…I just get on with it. But down the road I’d like to get myself figured out.